My reverences for my batchmates

I simply despise writing. But, i have managed something and here it goes. My words for my friends...

Sandeep somisetty: I have been an accomplice of this bugger in countless of his escapades. An absolutely headless bloke who gets a sudden kick even with the slightest of the thoughts of booze and gals. Quintessential man, he is. I can imagine him on the bottle of Johnny Walker.  With a drop of booze on his tongue, he could be the wittiest and funniest of the folks who can bring people to pieces. Lucky to be other side I have derived mind numbing pleasure from the banter he throws. You have been a great friend and will be whole my life. All the best J

Bala: I can proclaim this without doubt that Bala is the most down to earth, friendly, easy going and nicest person I have met at XL. He was my first friend here and like most of us he came to senses in the inebriated state. I was bewitched by the way he could gulp gallons of alcohol in no time. With the brains of Einstein and the moves of Presley, he could one of the most versatile persons. It’s an honor and a blessing for me to have spent the best of my times at XL with him. All the best J

Sayan: An uninspiring antiquated hairstyle, an esoteric accent, and the sunken eyes. Dint seem like ‘my type’.  But I was gravely mistaken. On the back of a bottle of beer this bloke can go berserk and this sudden fillip in his hormones is good enough to impregnate futile womenJ In his more sober excursions Finance is severely battered and conquered which resulted in him being knighted with the much acclaimed ‘Fin God’ status. The camaraderie we shared in this sojourn will be poignantly missed and fondly remembered. All the bestJ

Sadique: The ‘Bhaiya’ of our class with a penchant for studies and making it big in the corporate world had a sudden role reversal in the second year when he unveiled the Dionysus in him. The humble guy of yesterday was suddenly shaking legs with the Who’s Who of XL and flying high with booze flowing around. This ‘Idea Factory’ equipped with an arsenal of hotties took Crescent to a new ‘high’. Amidst all this with his constant focus on 4Ps, he conquered the world of marketing. Creativity is his forte and humility his core. Been one of my closest friends and will always be. All the best J

Sako: On a night soaked in the spirit of Bacchus, I was introduced to flameshots by this guy. With common shared values on the football field and the arena of booze our friendship grew and we together shared moments of joy and despair (when we lost to BarcaL). Born fraxers, we know how to live a dignified life with it unlike Somi. Evolving with a knack of marketing he got a much coveted seat in MAXI. Soon he developed love for Tamal Pal which was well taken and appreciated J He has been one of the closest friend and the nicest neighbor .All the best.

Sowmya: Loaded with ebullience and vivacity and backed by her ‘megastructure’, Sowmya is an instant hit wherever she goes. Our shared visions on woolgathering, making plans, procrastinating and never cribbing made us friends in no time.  Her inherent love for finance got her a coveted seat in Fund Manger where she dazzled with the ‘Power’ sector. With her absolute disability at feigning pretenses and throwing tantrums (unlike other girls) she is the truest person one could ever meet. Together we endured the excesses and brutalities of Anjana on our way to Mumbai J Blessed are us to have her in our midst. I bet she will read this and say “Kuch Bhi”. All the bestJ

Anjana: The only person I am shit scared of at XL is Anjana. With her life threatening words and killer looks she is one girl you wont even wanna meet in your dreams :P The gift of gab that was endowed to her has been utilized to the fullest. However, sleeping tops the list of her priorities in life. A very straightforward and congenial person, she is the life of BM B. It was a pleasure to have her as one of my nicest friends. All the best J

Compu: The chotu baby of our batch, suddenly grew of age and became a Casanova. He was reported to have been an international hacker during the first year. However, priorities changed and he took charge of the gassing business at MAXI. In no time his French and swede connections were revealed and he was Hugh Hefner in the making. His orgies at nude beaches burned guys to ashes. He tried his hands at booze which got him into the realm of life ravaging Somi. One of my best friends at XL, Compu you will be missed. All the bestJ

Divya: The sweetest girl of our batch who is always smiling. We became great friends in no time and I have a special name for her which I know she likes. Backed by her sincerity and brains she is already making it big in the corporate world and I am sure she will go places. It’s been an honor and blessing to have her around. All the Best J

Kaushik Da: Without a doubt I can say that the way we respect and listen to Dada, makes him Dada in the truest sense. His sense of maturity and decency is truly unmatched. His assertiveness when he speaks and the depth of his knowledge has no parallels. He has a very funny style of walking and off late his acrobats on the football field (he came of retirement) have been even funnierJ He has been a great inspiration to me and I wish him all the luckJ

Avik: He is the most sincere guy I have ever met. His love for Chicken and cricket is well known. Together we had hell of a fun during Maxi Fair. Our attempts to get responses for Maxi Fair were truly hilariousJ I wish him luck for his future endeavors.

Akshay: It’s the biggest coincidence in my life that the two of us were next to each other alphabetically and then we also have same pet name (Rishu). We guys were tailor made as room-mates. With our inherent desires to sleep the whole day, bunk classes, love for finance, music etc. we share a perfect chemistry. We are two nocturnal creatures who come to senses in the dead of the night. His love for basketball earned him quick fame and soon he was training the hot babes of our batch ‘to play with the ball’ J An absolutely ingenuous and caring person, he has been a great friend. All the best J

Shifa: On one extreme there is Anjana and on the other Shifa. This qualifies Shifa as the nicest girl at XL J. With her charm and purity backed by her ethereal persona and ingenuous smile, she is simply adorable. The funniest thing about Shifa is that she is too paranoid about gaining weight when actually she is hovering around the so called size zero. We have similar kind of shoes and the same will never be true about our mufflers J. She has been amongst my dearest friends and will always be. All the best J

Kunal: If there is one guy who has inspired me at XL, its kunal. We have been partners in crime at IIMC. My god he is the most creative and most courageous guy I have seen. The best part about him is that he is what he is. No artificiality. Zilch. He does not talk on your back because he has the balls to say it on your face. Together we have discussed and analyzed every aspect of the all the hotties at XL J. Somehow our frequency matches so perfectly that we have been great friends. Aur jab daaru saath aa jaata hai to phir to kehna hein nahi. All the best Kunal J

Pathikrit: Pursuing MBA is a part time activity for Pathikrit. His prime activity is filling his mind with terabytes of movies. He has been fed on so many English movies that due to paucity of them he has started relying on regional movies. His joblessness reached heights when he bunked a 6 o clock class for sleep:). Somehow he has managed to escape the curse of Dionysus which we all have succumbed to. A very talented and caring guy and when it comes to quizzing he will vanquish anyone (well almost!!!). Please submit your ethics assignment before convoJ All the best J

Dassani: The extremely irascible sound that he emits from his nostrils which have been blocked since time immemorial and his built which makes sub Saharan people feel super healthy, he surely is the ‘Sick boy’ of BM B. He is reported to be a billionaire on the back of his havellis and the 1.25 lac which yielded mega returns based on tips he took from SengoJ. A die hard Archie’s fan and a voracious reader; he can be the most helpful and caring guy. We have been connected through a secret window and it has been a pleasure. ATB J

Gaurav Sharma: I still wonder how he managed a couple of years with a Lenevo Laptop. His resilience was displayed with his rags to riches story in BFA, which made global headlines. He took controls of the computing arena with close friends Podder and Maddy. The fraternity was completed when another bigwig Tamal Pal brought on boardJ. A guy with a transparent nature, I have had numerous opportunities to work with him and it has always been a pleasure. Lately, he has taken the consulting world by surprise. ATBJ

Ashutosh: The smartest personality of our class has seen it all. After placing the seniors, he tried his hands at managing risk and then finally becoming a consultant. A very good speaker and my colleague at battering the jokars, it has been a pleasure to have him in our midst. ATBJ

Vidisha: This adorable lady has been the closest friend I have had at XL. With her life mired by gaffes that she commits every now and then she is passionate about whatever she does. An absolutely scintillating character she is always dazzling with her god gifted smile. She has borne the brunt of countless conspiracy theories that I devise every day. She has accompanied me to the scores of restaurants tirelessly. You will be missed dearly. All the best J

Ankit: The CEO of the class is unique. He had the vision to make it big even before coming to the college. What he has already achieved is unthinkable for most of us even 20 years for now. A colleague at drubbing the jokars, he is always full of ‘sustainable’ ideas. Wish you all the luck J

Brain Damage

This is the story about a simple guy who tried to unearth some untouched stones. Lucky he was, to narrate the story to me. The story as told by this guy who does not want to be named.

I had a chance to have a conversation with an eminent professor of a leading B School. The professor claimed to “bare it all” (not literally) in the thirty minute candid session.  I had always suspected a few profs of egregious and sadistic motives. On being questioned regarding the difficult course curriculum which was floated out every year to poor chaps who were living miles away from home in hostile conditions and paying hefty sums of money that their whole lineage has not earned in several decades, the prof replied that the course structure is very much in line with likes of Harvards and Stanfords. The fee that is being charged is a result of the continuous effort by the college to optimize the debt-equity mix. On being probed regarding the randomness in grades the professor claimed that is the case with placements and shorlisting as well. I hit back by saying that “shortlisting was not that random, at least there you can figure out a desperate attempt by some sexually starved people”. The professor reacted wittingly saying “analyze the grades you will find the same there as well, it is just a little subtle and not that blatant”. I was taken aback by the statement and the tracks like ‘Dance of death’ followed by ‘Be quick or be dead’ being played in the backdrop added to the horror. The framed pictures of Hannibal Lector and what appeared like ‘Eddie the Head’ on the blood red coloured painted walls were not amongst the most picturesque of the sightings. After a brief pause I gained by momentum. However, the smoke that the prof lashed out of what appeared like a local bidi was making me feel fidgety.

The prof went on to claim that they derived sadistic pleasure by seeing the students’ suffering and pain. On being asked that the students considered many of the profs as father figures and was such deceit justified??, the prof got incensed. He said that lifelong these students would be preyed on by the merciless corporates, we are just preparing them for the same. And what’s wrong if we have come to enjoy it he said with a wink. When quizzed about the presence of underground society of profs which devises novel means to torture students, the prof feigned shock and awe. However, on assuring him absolute anonymity, he said that such a society exists from ages and was similar to underground societies at western universities like Yale. He claimed that they have a strong financial backing as they get money from the ancestral property of Hitler and Mussolini. After a couple of minutes of pondering the prof said that means developed by their secret society were not inhumane and were not targeted at physical torture like BDSM and Opus Dei. The stress here was on ’brain damage’. On being asked about the recent increase in intake of number of students the cranky prof replied with a devilish smile- “What appeared to have been a major cause of concern earlier has now become tantalizing and mouth watering prospect as we have been able to develop more apt and devious methods which can inflict damage in one go and we have also been able to rope in more and more like minded people in this profession of the intellects”.

This person apparently felt so shocked and overwhelmed that he could not tell me his whole story. However, he considers himself lucky to have escaped unscathed. Currently, he is being treated at a local clinic for the mental trauma that he went through. This person believes that the satanic side of the profs has been exposed.

CQued

Not long ago the hallowed portals of XL were invaded by a creepy little acronym called CQPI(more popularly known as CQ). Soon CQ invaded every nook and cranny of XL like a contagious virus. There were absolutely no places where u can hide from CQ. There was not much one can do-either to give in to its demands or get annihilated. Demands were so sinister and inhumane that even the life under the iron curtains would have felt like a blessing. There was a bunch of people who decided to stage a fight. They decided to follow in the path of Mahatma Gandhi. They staged the non cooperation movement and boycotted every attempt of CQ to corrupt their souls, with absolute disdain and contempt. They watched movies, bunked classes, slept a heck lot, boozed day in day out... you name it they did it. CQ was enraged. CQ fought back with ruthlessness in what it called “the battle of the End Terms”. The gory attacks almost crippled the army. Most of them gave in to its demands. Three battles of end terms were fought in a year. The debilitating damage that CQ did was irreversible. Then some poor souls decided to take help from outside forces like CFA, FRM, live projects etc. But their demands were even more gruesome. So finally the movement which was biggest of them all was unveiled- “The Indifference movement”. More bluntly termed by some as “I don’t care, p*** off CQ”.